I am Mary. This is my memory of “the day the earth stood still.” My husband, John, will give you his version of “the diagnosis” in later posts. I have a sort of gestalt view, where days get mixed up, but John’s view will be more detailed.
John & Mary -- John's Story
John has never smoked a cigarette in his life. I say that not because it makes him more “worthy” of good health or that I think smokers “deserve what they get” (because they don’t, by the way). I tell you this because the diagnosis of lung cancer came entirely out of the blue, the mother of all sandbags.
It started as a cough in the spring of 2005. Ironically, I was coughing, too. We thought nothing of it because, if both of us are coughing, it must be a cold, right? At worst, it must be some sort of mold or dust in the house, right? Wrong. My coughing was the result of a weird but well-known side effect of blood pressure medication and once it was adjusted, my coughing disappeared.
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INTERACTION WITH THE PERSON MOST KNOWLEDGEABLE ABOUT YOUR CANCER AND YOUR TREATMENT
When I think of the communication between doctors and patients at the time that cancer is diagnosed, I remember the great scene between Debra Winger and her oncologist in “Terms of Endearment.” Debra is lying in her hospital bed and the doctor says, “Dear, you have a malignancy.” After he says a few more lines of dialogue, she stops him and asks, “Could you say that again?”
No one is ever prepared to hear the words, “You have cancer.” When my husband was diagnosed, the world seemed to stop turning. The doctor’s mouth continued to move but the sound didn’t seemed to be turned on. Looking back, there are so many questions we just did not know to ask. Invariably, they were the ones we wished we had and the ones we were asked over and over.
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Fish Oil 101
Okay — put on your biochemistry hat for a minute. Don’t turn away. If I can understand this, so can you. As Kris Carr says in her terrific book Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips (1), you have to send yourself to “cancer college” the minute you or your loved one is diagnosed with cancer. Knowledge is power. So, with a nod (and a cite) to Ms. Carr, think of this post as “Fish Oil 101.”
Love Your Fat
Even though we have been taught to hate fat, the body needs fat. Fats store nutrients and accumulated fat is burned for energy. There is, however, good fat and bad fat and — in the case of Omega 3 (the fat found in fish oil, nuts and seeds) — “essential” fat.(2)
Essential fats, or “essential fatty acids” (EFA) are nature’s primary healing fats. Omega 3, one of the most potent and pure forms of EFA, is a strong antioxident, an anti-viral and anti-fungal powerfood. Omega 3’s are the world’s best anti-infection agents.
Omega 3, and EFA in general, is absolutely essential for the storage of nutrients in the body. The body does not manufacture an EFA so you have to eat food containing EFA to have them in your body. Id.
Well, you might ask,we know we want to stay healthy but why are EFA’s essential for people with cancer? Good question. It requires a little explanation.
Coping with Chemo’s Powerhouse Veggie Smoothie Recipe
SMOOTHIE BASE:
1 package tofu (we like Mori-Nu Extra-Firm Silken Tofu)
6-8 baby carrots or one large carrot
1 cup whole milk
2-4 scoops of Weight Gain powder. We recommend Naturade.
VEGETABLES:
1 cup orange juice
3/4 fresh or frozen unsweetened apple juice
1 cup chopped vegetables (such as celery or tomatoes) or frozen fruit
Optional nutritional supplements*
Morning glory
I am not a doctor. My husband has cancer. He was diagnosed in October 2005. When I learned that John had cancer and that it was Stage IV lung cancer, I was devastated. I felt utterly powerless. I had no control over what was happening.
But I am not a wallower. I am constitutionally unable to stay sad. I prefer action. So, when I learned of the cancer, I began to look for ways to take control of the situation and make a difference. I make no claim that anything I am about to tell you will save your life or the life of someone you love. What I will tell you, however, is how you can take control of something; how you can make a difference.
For some scientific reasons that I don’t claim to understand, cancer kills people in a lot of different ways. The most obvious way is that the cancer invades a vital organ (like the lung, liver or pancreas) and stops it from functioning. What I did not realize, and what I learned from sifting through a mountain of information over the Internet, is that most people who die of cancer, die before that stage.
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